March Fatness Round 1: Jared From Subway Region

 

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If this is the first you’re hearing about the March Fatness,
click the link to learn more and see the full brackets.

THE JARED FROM SUBWAY REGION

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Jared used to fill out this bracket every afternoon to determine his 3rd dinner. Then he made the toughest decision of his life and basically gave up all of it. Now we have some of the toughest decisions in the world to make…lets take a look at the first round results:

#1 Thanksgiving Leftovers vs. #16 Avocado vs Mango

-Avocado takes mango in the play-in game, but it doesn’t matter, because they were overpowered in the first round. That one bite of turkey, stuffing, mashed, and gravy beats the best bite of avocado in the world.

#8 Mashed Potatoes and Gravy vs. #9 Pasta and Marinera Sauce

-Pasta, marinera, and parmasan cheese is a combo as smooth as Montana to Rice. Pots and gravy are good, but pasta takes the win, because of the variety of different pastas to choose from. Also, homeade pasta and sauce beats homeade mashed and gravy every time.

#5 Waffles vs. #12 French Fries

-The 12 seed beats the 5 seed just about every year. A hot, crisp on the outside, soft on the inside, crinkly french fry is amazing when zooted. With waffles, there is the mess/utencil factor. You get sticky from the syrup, plus a fork and knife need to be present in order to spread butter and cut the waffle. Its too much of a hassle, and the easy, tasty, french fry takes the W.

#13 Soft Pretzel vs. #4 Mac and Cheese 

-Soft Pretzel made a game of this for about 3 quarters, but then the gooeyness took over. Mac and Cheese can be made a variety of ways, and no matter which way it is prepared, the smooth gooeyness of the cheese always warms up the loins.

#3 Steak and Cheese vs. #14 Donuts

-Steak and Cheese subs were just too big and strong for donuts. Donuts were turning some heads with their athleticcenter (glazed) down low, but the consistency of Steak and Cheese took over the game.

#6 Bagel and Cream Cheese vs. #11 Oreos

-Oreo’s had the lead with 13 seconds left, but the toasted everything bagel with veggie cream cheese hit a corner 3 for the win. Bagel’s are warm, crispy, soft, and cheesey. Oreos are the same taste over and over again. What a comeback for the bagel.

#7 Meatball Sub vs. #10 Chicken Caeser Wrap 

-Chicken Caeser Wraps can be eaten for lunch, breakfast, and late night snack, and thats why they took this victory. Meatball subs are good, but are mostly a dinner food. The versatility of the wrap, plus the sheer freshness of it, came up clutch for Chicken Caeser, as they beat the Meatball sub in OT.

#2 Cookies and Milk vs #15 Gummies 

-Soft, crispy, warm, then topped off with some cold, refreshing milk. Hard to beat that classic combo. Sorry gummy worms, but you were no match on this day.

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