Well, when it comes to burgahs, some people think it’s ok to eat just about anything they want, even if that burger is not meant to be grilled under any circumstances.  I am perplexed as to how some people can eat raw, young burgers that are just not flavorful.  Let’s take a look at some of the most notorious undigested burger eaters of all time.

Number 1: Jeffrey Lionel Dahmer

The name burger does not even deserve to be touched on when speaking of this unprocessed burger eater.  This man had a fetish for burgers past their expiration date, or as we call it, dead bodies.

Number 2: Woody Allen
Sexually assaulted his seven year old daughter.  There is no excuse for eating unrefined burgers, especially when that burger comes from the same cow as you, the same family.

Number 3: R Kelly
This guy is the man for giving the world enthralling pieces of art such as “Ignition” and “Step In The Name of Love”, in spite of the fact that he constructed a sex tape in which he proceeded to urinate in a fourteen year old girls mouth.  I love ketchup, mustard, relish, mayonnaise, hot sauce, basically anything you can think of on my burger.  But urine, i’m going to have to pass on that one.

Number 4: Lawrence Taylor
The Hall of Fame linebacker payed a 16 year old prostitute 300 dollars for sex in a suburban hotel room in 2010.  Taylor’s response to pleading guilty.  “I still like the chase, but I like to stack the deck in my favor.  I don’t like to work too hard.”  Look, Lawrence.  If you want an easy burger, In-N-Out.  Their burgers are young, fresh and legal.

Number 5: Michael Moore
This guy has never been alleged of being a sex offender, but look at him.  This guy has creep written all over him.