Every boy and man has gone through this probably at least a couple two maybe tree times in their life. One finds himself hooking up with a new burgah (may be well done, may be medium rare) at a party and is curious to see where this pley will end up. So this mush suggest to the burgah, “Hey lets go some place more private.” If the girl agrees, this mush is obviously think one of two things, either “I’m about to get some burgah” or “LE PLEEYYYY.”  This is where it all goes wrong. Yes, you should have that mindset going into this situation, but that mindset is often misleading and results into what I like to call “The Pre-mature Johnson Pull.”

So take the scenario I was just describing, and put yourself in that situation. You’re thinking burgahs…I mean obviously, mushes are savages these days. You find yourself in a secluded area with some random jivle (broad),  and things are getting pretty hot and heavy pretty quickly. We know you’re horny, but the real question is, is she horny? Who knows, but you wanna find out right. Usually men don’t ask the girl to burgah because then its just awkward and you look like a complete charles and probably turn off the girl right away. Sooo you’re being a curious george and don’t know how to act except pull out the old  boomstick. Remember mush, you just met this chick, so that probably wasn’t the best move. From my own experiences it probably works 10% of the time, and only works on turkey burgahs, complete sluts, or a hooker.

After you plop out your stuff, the chick has one thing on her mind, “I’m not going near that smelly burgah.” This is when it goes from bad to worse. She stops hooking up with you, backs away and makes up some lame excuse as to why she needs to leave. Typical excuses might be “Umm I need to go find my friends” “I need to fix my lipstick” or my personal favorite, “Oh my god I just remembered I have to go do this thing.” She leaves you burgahless in seattle, and and this point you’re in serious need of a touch. You went from hooking up with a nice new Burgah Piece to touching your own culture later that night. Remember mushes, theres always a time and place to whip out the Johnson. But wait for her to initiate the touch.